August 2006 Archives

They add up...

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In have an old glass water bottle in my home office. It sits next to my television. It's a 750mL Voss water bottle - it's real tall and slender, and it has an opening (mouth) that's about the size of a gallon milk jug's.

I've been using it to keep my spare change. I don't use cash very often, preferring instead to pay with my trusty debit card, so it's not often that I unload my pockets of coin money. I believe that I last emptied it in 2003 or 2004...

I noticed yesterday that the bottle was extremely full - I couldn't fit a single quarter into it any more, so I decided to empty it and take it to the coin counter machine. Turns out that I had a nice little haul in that Voss bottle - $91.35.

After the coin machine took it's cut, I left with about $80. I don't believe that my bank has a coin counting machine - they've phased them out because they're expensive to buy, expensive to operate, expensive to maintain, and they don't get used very often any more.

All in all, I'm pretty happy with the results. Or, I should say I was pretty happy with the results - I filled-up the Tahoe after trading in the coin, and almost cried when the pump said "$60.50."

Double dose: wow!

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I just finished AFHV, and turned on the Discovery channel - they're talking about deadly toxins...

100 grams of Botulinum can kill every living thing on the planet - holy cats!

The poison dart frog, a small, brightly colored frog found in Central America, is the most deadly animal on the planet. The equivalent of 2 grains of salt worth of this frogs poison (it's excreted from its skin) can kill a person, almost instantly.

Just thought this was interesting stuff...

Oh, America, you're so funny!

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A few posts ago, I admitted that I was addicted to download speed. Well, it turns out I'm also addicted to America's Funniest Home Videos. I wath it every night at 11:00pm (on WGN), and I must laugh 30 times during each show. Tonight's episode is one of the $100,000 Grand Prize winner shows -- man, it's classic!

After watching the show every night for almost a year, I've come to the following conclusions:

- An adult should never use a trampoline, ever.

- Mom's shouldn't try to drive their children's motorcycles, even if it's only in the backyard

- 9 out of 10 cats really dislike water (and bathtubs, in particular)

- If you ever plan to chop down a tree, make sure you get a video camera first

- An adult should never use a pogo stick, ever.

- Cats in paper bags are always funny

- Never leave a child home alone with access to: paint, nail polish, food coloring, or any other permanent "ink-like" product

- If you ever plan to jump your bike or try to cross a stream, get a video camera first

- Practicing your tee-shot from the patio is always a bad idea

- An adult should never play any form of baseball with a child, without the use of a "cup."

Hilarious stuff, this AHV is. I love it.

Holy cow.

So, all I've heard anyone talk about lately is "" - it's been on the news; Saturday Night Live did a skit about it; everyone online makes references to it; Rupert Murdoch bought it for $580 million a few weeks ago...

If I were him, I'd want my money back. Heck, I just spent 3 minutes trying to navigate around, and all I know is that I want my 3 minutes back. Talk about an awful site. It can serve no useful purpose - there is nothing in the real world that is lame enough for me to compare to, so rather than beat my head against the desk trying to think of ultra-dumb, worthless things to compare to, I'll share what I've learned from my 3 minutes on

* You build a myspace page if you're 11 - 13 years old, or are trying to impress 11 - 13 year old kids

* When building your page try to follow these popular myspace trends:
a. Use a neon pink background with an annoying yellow pattern; bonus points if you find a background that has animation incorporated
b. Use a white-colored font on that pink background, so no one can read what you're writing
c. Choose an ultra-annoying song that will load quickly and play repeatedly as people visit your page
d. Show complete disregard for any HTML standards - in fact, try your best ot insult HTML
e. Find an old 0.0001 megapixel camera phone with a scratched lens that's been dunked in a milkshake and use it to take 400 similar pictures of yourself
f. Post 398 of those 400 pictures ot your myspace page
g. Use your newly designed and "ultra kool" page to complain about how miserable your 12 years of life have been; try to show everyone how "kool" you are by writing about how you don't care about anything, and about how everything sucks (except for your kool page, of course)
h. Get yourself 200 "friends" to throw out annoying "shout outs" to you and your awesome page. Example of a proper shout out = "OMGHI2U, ur so kool! ur page is the most bestest everest! luv2u!"

That'll do it... if you observe any of these tips, you're well on your way to becoming a myspace legend

Wow. I can't believe that site is so "popular" - it's honestly awful. If Mr. Murdoch can't find anything better to do with $580 million than to buy some lame teenie-bopper site that's dying a quick and painful death, I'd like to suggest that he float a small portion - maybe 10% of that $580 million my way... I could put it to much better use.

There isn't any other good way to share with you how horrible is... other than to suggest that you visit it for yourself. My only suggestion is that you keep sharp objects as far away from you as possible, because after 30 seconds on that trainwreck you'll either: (a) try to stab your computer, or (b) stab yourself.

I love my speed

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Haven't posted in a while... so, I figured I'll share this little tidbit: I'm adicted to speed.

Download speed, that is. I've been getting crazy download speeds lately - check it out:


It takes me seconds to download music from iTunes, or to download Windows updates/patches/fixes... which reminds me - the other night, when I was fixing one of my neighbor's computers, I needed to download a 300MB driver file from HP.

On their paltry internet connection, Cox's most basic offering (at $29.95/month), it would've taken nearly 4 hours to download. With my internet connection (at $39.95/month), it took just over 4 minutes. In their face!

I love it. It's so awesome.