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After 13 solid days of serious workouts and hardcore dieting (sticking to my plan without any deviation), I fell apart. The weaker side of me wants to blame it on work - we had a stressful week for one of my projects and it all came to a massive boil-over on Wednesday night, which led to an over-eating session on Thursday.

The harsher side of me says I fell apart because I'm trying to self-destruct my diet for some reason... there should've been no reason to ditch the plan, and times of extreme stress and challenge shouldn't provide an excuse to stuff my face with reckless abandon.

But, I did. I ate a boatload of bad food on Thursday. And just when I was really starting to get back on track. I was feeling great, making progress, and getting into a solid routine. And then it crumbled. I tried to reconcile the bad night by assuring myself that my upcoming Crazy Legs run (an 8K/5-mile fun run) would serve as a "spring board" to get me back on track...

But Saturday morning came, and...


Why are there slippers instead of running shoes on that race tag?

Because I freaking overslept the race. What the heck is wrong with me? CRIKEY.

I know what's wrong... I'm not sleeping well - I haven't had a good night's sleep in what seems like a year or more. The primary reason lies with my crappy apartment(s).

This most recent apartment is so stressful and "toxic" to live in. I can't relax, I can't unwind, I can't escape, I can't do anything other than search for reasons to leave (whether it's going out to run or ride, or going for unnecessary drives, or spending a ton of time at friends' houses, or sitting at a bar or restaurant). I want nothing more than to not be at the apartment. I really dislike my neighbors, whom are noisy and inconsiderate, and I especially dislike the management - they don't care about the noise problems, and don't respond to any inquiries or pleas for help.

So it's impossible to sleep, because as soon as I do get back to the apartment and I try to unwind and fall asleep, my stress levels rise; I can hear every single sound/noise/conversation/bump/thump/etc., and as such, I don't sleep more than a few hours a night. I'm constantly being woken-up, and I'm usually wide awake every morning by 5:00am. The sleep systems I blogged about a few weeks ago help me to fall asleep, but they don't keep me asleep... so, I hit the bed at around 11:00pm or so and am usually awake at 1:30, 3:00, 4:00, and 5:00.... not good.

Well, I somehow managed to have an unbelievably good nights' worth of sleep on Friday night... I went to bed around 11:30 or so, and I don't think I moved a single inch until about 10:15am on Saturday... a full 15 minutes after the race started.

When I realized what time it was, I sprung out of bed and started racing around trying to find my shoes, shorts, etc... but it was for naught. Even if I could've made it downtown, found a parking spot, and hit the starting line in record time, I would've been at least an hour late. Instead, I channeled my efforts into preparing for a nice 5-mile run on my own race circuit.

I threw on the shoes, opened the door, took a wonderful breath of the spring air, and started my run. And that's when strike two hit... every single muscle in my upper core (from the base of my neck to the top of my pelvis) felt like someone was jamming knives into them. With each stride, I winced and lost my breath. What in the heck is wrong with me????

I walked for a bit and gave myself a bit of a self massage on my ribs, chest, arms, neck, and abs; my whole core was so incredibly tender that the self massage hurt like crazy. I tried some more jogging, but no way was that going to work. I alternated trying to walk and jog for about 10 minutes, but gave up. It was simply too painful. It hurt as bad as, if not worse than, my ribs did after my ice-dive from earlier this winter.

I was so angry; I'm not sure if I slept wrong, or "slept too hard," or if springing out of bed pulled something, but I had never felt such an unbelievable amount of pain over such a large area. I figured I could ride my bike on the trainer for a bit, and was correct. I "finished" the morning with a 3-hour session on the trainer, cursing my bad luck the entire time. I spent Saturday night with my friends Dan and Tara - had a great dinner in Fort Atkinson, and then hung out with them for a bit back at their house.

I woke-up this morning, took a quick inventory of the core-pain, and discovered it was slightly better but still very tender and sore, so... I took today off - I figured I would give myself a full weekend worth of rest, and with any luck will be ready for a 4-5 mile run tomorrow morning.

And finally, just to make sure that my path of self destruction continues to steam full speed ahead, I drove up to Fox Lake and had dinner at the infamous "Boat House" with my cousin and her husband. I've heard a lot about the place and had been wanting to try it for quite some time, so I took a drive up north to enjoy some of their infamous pizza.


The pizza was phenomenal, as were the cheese curds, breaded mushrooms, and fresh-popped pop corn. Everything was superb. The Boat House sits right on Fox Lake and has an awesome view of the lake. There's a ton of outdoor seating, complete with a Tiki Bar; I'm confident this would be a great summer hang out spot. With any luck, I'll still fit into a swimming suit come summer time... :-)

Back at it on Monday, and I'll do my best to not let external stress sway me from eating well and sticking to my plans... one single event avalanched into 4 days of bad eating, bad workouts, and more stress.

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This page contains a single entry by Steve published on May 1, 2011 9:39 PM.

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